Guidelines to Polish Individuals for the Irish Police

February 26, 2009

From BBC News

The mystery of Ireland’s worst driver

Details of how police in the Irish Republic finally caught up with the country’s most reckless driver have emerged, the Irish Times reports.

He had been wanted from counties Cork to Cavan after racking up scores of speeding tickets and parking fines.

However, each time the serial offender was stopped he managed to evade justice by giving a different address.

But then his cover was blown.

It was discovered that the man every member of the Irish police’s rank and file had been looking for – a Mr Prawo Jazdy – wasn’t exactly the sort of prized villain whose apprehension leads to an officer winning an award.

In fact he wasn’t even human.

Prawo Jazdy is actually the Polish for driving licence and not the first and surname on the licence,” read a letter from June 2007 from an officer working within the Garda’s traffic division.

“Having noticed this, I decided to check and see how many times officers have made this mistake.

“It is quite embarrassing to see that the system has created Prawo Jazdy as a person with over 50 identities.”

The officer added that the “mistake” needed to be rectified immediately and asked that a memo be circulated throughout the force.

In a bid to avoid similar mistakes being made in future relevant guidelines were also amended.

And if nothing else is learnt from this driving-related debacle, Irish police officers should now know at least two words of Polish.

As for the seemingly elusive Mr Prawo Jazdy, he has presumably become a cult hero among Ireland’s second largest immigrant population.

I bet he has! Knowing Poles, it’s very likely they have actually told the policemen that it’s their very name. Perhaps the 51st just wasn’t able to do it with straight face.

The Irish police might want to learn a thing or two about the Polish grammar. Female first names always end with an ‘a’. That’s the law! Male first names tend to end with a consonant.

Words ending with an ‘o’ indicate the neutral gender, so it’s neither he nor she, only it. Dziecko – baby, mleko – milk, miasto – city, ciasto – cake, prawo – law.

The one exception worth bothering with is Mieszko, however, the majority of guys boasting of this name look something like this.

Make sure he doesn’t carry a sword behind the passenger’s seat.

Permis de Conduire printed at the top of the licence isn’t a name either, even if some fancied it’s an Earl Permis of Conduire.

The Irish police might also want to check how many times an individual named Dowód Osobisty (Personal ID) caused them all kinds of troubles.

Rzeczpospolita Polska is not a woman, even though some claim to the contrary.


Caution: Gregorz Brzęczyszczykiewicz could be a real name, but there exists a great danger that its owner is charged with all possible diversions, including the direct outburst of WWII. Make sure he’s not similar to this man.


6 Responses to “Guidelines to Polish Individuals for the Irish Police”

  1. Спасибо громадное за предоставленную сообщение. Жрать рад разместить ее у себя на дневнике. Если Вы не против, то я так и совершу.Если жрать какие-то проблеммы со копирайтом, постучитесь на мой дневник,я целое исправлю. Так же прибавил Ваш служба на соцзакладки. Вообщем если что обращайтесь, – вовек выслушаю и постигнуть. Со, уважительностью, Firestarter.

  2. Sylwia said

    Hi Firestarter! You’re free to translate my posts for your blog (if I understood you correctly and that’s what you wish), however, the link behind your name took me to a page with a game “East and West. Brotherhood. Part III”.

  3. khrystene said

    Great posts, so I have subscribed to your blog 🙂

    Incidentally, my friend’s almost 2 year old son is called Mieszko 😉


  4. Sylwia said

    Thank you!

    It seems we’re back to Slavic names. 😉

  5. khrystene said

    Hooray I say!! 😀

  6. PMK said

    Isn’t this funny?!

    Personally, Polish has become the most important thing I’ve ever learned in school (that, and how to take shots like a man.) <- Same story here.

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